Before and After: Progress 2/3 of the Way There!

A couple of days ago Matt and I were looking at pictures from about five years ago, Christmas of 2006. He called me over to the computer because he wanted me to realize something amazing. When I looked at the computer I saw someone on the screen that I didn't recognize. Someone I had forgotten about. When you see yourself every day, everything seems normal, the same... unchanging.

Reality slaps when the past comes for a visit.

This is what I saw:

216 lbs. At least. 

When you are in the thick of it, you don't even realize what is going on. I was so unhealthy. Yes, I have a medical condition that helps me keep the weight on when I want to let it go, and I am working on reversing the condition through working out and eating right, but I can't deny that my eating habits and laziness at the time contributed to it. Running? I couldn't even run to the end of the block without feeling like I was going to die. I was bursting from the seams and in denial that I needed a larger pants size. Isn't that one of the stages of dealing with an issue? Denial? 

Another dramatic view of the past: 

2006 on a hike with friends

The shock when I saw these floored me. 

Then I looked at pictures now. 45 pounds down from my largest recorded weight. Not only 45 pounds down, but also about 25% body fat is gone with it. Four pants sizes since the days of the pictures above. Four 1/2 marathons under my belt, and training for a full marathon under way. 

After? 

November, 2011, Las Vegas Rock 'N' Roll 1/2 Marathon

Personal best time: 2:46:34

Me on the far left, January 15th, P.F. Chang's Rock 'N' Roll Arizona

Personal best time: 2:39:55

I was astounded. Sometimes you need to take a trip down memory lane to really tell where you have traveled. Hard work, healthy habits and strong support from those you love and trust get you a long way. I am forever grateful for everyone who has been so encouraging to me on my long journey. I am not done yet. I still have about 35-40 pounds to go, but I am proud of myself.

I am headed for Seattle on June 23 for the Seattle Rock 'N' Roll FULL marathon this year. For those who know me well, you know that this is a VERY significant date to me. This is my 30th birthday. On this day,  plan to not only be at my goal weight and clothing size, I plan to complete my first ever full marathon. Crazy? Maybe. Exciting? Absolutely. A fitting celebration for ringing in the big Three-oh? ABSOLUTELY! I am going to dress up in a tutu, wear a funny tiara and strut my stuff up and down the insane hills of the Seattle marathon. I am eagerly anticipating it, looking forward to waving to my amazing friends and family who will be there to support me along the way, and coming home with the bling I will pick up at the end. I will go into my 30th year of life healthier, stronger and even better than I have ever been. It is a great feeling knowing that I will check into the next chapter of my life as who I truly want to be. 

Is my running journey over after this? NO! Once I have met my Rock 'N' Roll goals, I am going to take on DISNEY! Tinkerbell Run, Disney World 1/2 (or full!), Disneyland 1/2, Princess Run and MORE! Bring it on. My running journey has just begun, but it is important to stop and celebrate the milestones as they come up. 

Thank you to my husband, family and friends. I could not have made it to where I am without any of you. I love you. 

Meeting Personal Goals

I am working toward running the Las Vegas Rock 'N' Roll 1/2 marathon in under 3 hours. The first time I ran in January my time was 3:06:29. The second 1/2 in San Diego was 3:02:05. I was so disappointed that I was so close but yet so, so far away! I am still kicking myself for not running five more minutes, or one more mile.

I have been through some pretty huge ups and downs in the past four months. I ran the San Diego 1/2 in June and was in my peak of performance. I then spent 16 days in the Biosphere and then three weeks traveling to visit family. My exercise was sporadic at best. Not only was my exercise sporadic, my weight that I had worked so hard to take off decided half of it wanted to come back.

One morning I flipped. I put on a dress from the spring before when I had lost a ton of weight and it was tight on my hips. I then stood on the scale and realized I was half a pound away from a point I said I would NEVER reach again. I lost it. My poor husband didn't know who he was looking at as I stomped around the house fuming and raging about my weight and how I felt about myself. I was a crazy woman. Absolutely nuts!

I went to my trainer at the gym and nearly had an emotional breakdown asking him what I needed to do. He said that I needed to cut out all sugars and to not have any carbs whatsoever after 3 PM. Top that off with some pretty intense 1/2 marathon training and I had a recipe for success. In my first week I lost 8 pounds! Now, 10 weeks into the thick of it, I have lost a total of 21 pounds. It is so incredibly worth it.

I spoke to my trainer about my training and he has set me up with a pretty intense program that I am LOVING. In general, it looks something like this:

Sunday: Long, Slow Distance for 3 hours
Monday: Off or Boot Camp at the gym
Tuesday: Run (Usually 4-6 miles easy, meaning I feel great at the end and am not breathless at all)
Wednesday: Intervals (For example, this week)
1/4 mile 2 minutes 30 seconds
1/4 mile 2 minutes 30 seconds
1/2 mile 5 minutes
1/2 mile 5 minutes
1 mile 10 minutes
1/2 mile 5 minutes
1/2 mile 5 minutes
1/4 mile 2 minutes 30 seconds
1/4 mile 2 minutes 30 seconds
Thursday: Off or light run
Friday: Run
Saturday: Run and see trainer

It kicks my butt and makes me feel good when I meet the goals set out for me. To be honest, I was terrified of the three hour run he wanted me to do today. The longest I had run in a very, very long time was a two hour run two weeks ago. I ran nine miles at a 4.5 mile per hour pace. I was fine cardiovascularly, but exhausted bodily. Would I be able to do three hours? I had taken a light week to recover this past week and had run 3-6 miles easy four times with no intervals or longer runs throughout the week. I was completely recovered and felt wonderful.

This morning at 5:30 I set out on my three hour run.

I ran 13 miles in just under 3 hours.

I did it. It was a complete breakthrough. The only thought I had was "Las Vegas, you are going DOWN!" I knew that if I could run 13 in the time I had set as a goal a month and a half before the actual run, I could totally blow that time out of the water and beat it. I am going to push hard, run those intervals and my 3 hour Sunday runs and love every minute of it.

I have even set a new goal. I set it before I have even finished my current one. I am going to run the San Diego FULL marathon in June of 2012. This will be my birthday gift to myself. My trainer is putting me on a now adjusted training program so that I will be ready. I figure I have eight months. Anything is possible in eight months! A year ago I would have laughed at you if you suggested I run a full marathon. Now, today, I feel anything is possible.

Adventures, Home and Away

This summer I had the blessing of being able to fly home to Oregon and then drive down to Tahoe and then back up to Oregon and once again through California on my way back home. In a total of three weeks I saw and did more than I had done in the past six months combined.

The first thing I did when I got to my parents house in Oregon was raid their kitchen. Why, you ask? My mom had purchased a flat of Oregon strawberries. If you have ever bought strawberries at the store, you know that it is a 50/50 chance that they are going to taste any good. Most of the time the centers are pure white and sickeningly bland. Well... These particular strawberries that my mom had picked up were from a little farm a few miles away where I picked berries as a kid. I was ecstatic. Each berry is like a small ball of sugar that bursts in your mouth, flooding your senses with a more pure strawberry taste than you have ever had before. Especially if you had only eaten store-bought berries before. I sliced a handful up and placed them over some Nancy's low fat yogurt (another hometown treat) and dug in.

Now, doesn't that look delicious? The berries are red all the way through and just dripped juice and sugar. Nothing is better than this treat.

The next thing I did was take a picture of my parents back yard in its full glory. This is only a fraction of the beauty that surrounds their home, but this particular part holds a special place in my heart because I designed the rose garden and helped my parents build it. Bless them for putting up with my stubbornness when it came to the way it was laid out!

It is definitely a little slice of paradise! The roses were in full bloom and the hops were crawling over the archway and the boxwood is finally all connected and a lovely hedge. I spent quite a bit of time wandering among the flowers taking pictures. It is so peaceful out there. And green! A far cry from the brown where I am now!

My parents and I always like to go on adventures. This time we hit the river in my dad's raft and drifted the river where my dad taught me how to row. After a few panicky moments I did pretty well!

 My amazing parents on the river! Dad was currently rowing. 

A view of the river from behind the boat. So beautiful! Look at the gorgeous clear sky! 

We had a blast! Some of us got a little wet (Dad more than anyone!) and the warm sun kept us drying off faster than I would have thought. 

I then headed up to my old stomping grounds: Oregon State University! Go Beavs! Where I visited some favorite places and some of my favorite people. 

 This is the quad in front of the Student Union building. I had just stepped off the cafe's balcony and out into the square. How I miss the hubbub of this school! 

Now this... This is a picture I sent to my hubby to make him jealous. I am getting ready to bite into the free slice of Cinnamon Chip bread from Great Harvest Bread Co. We used to get this as a special treat in college. Warm with a little butter makes this a sinful dessert. Or breakfast. Or whenever... Yum! Being without sugar for four weeks makes this look really really good right now! 

When I got home, and before we went to Lake Tahoe, my parents and I went on an evening hike of some local falls. The first one was pretty stunning: 

 I was taken with the height and beauty! 

The pathway leading to it was pretty lovely too! 

The second falls were a complete coincidence. We were looking for another location, but happened upon a sign for this one and decided to give it a chance. Boy were we in luck! 

 It was like a scene from a movie where they find a waterfall with the blue pool at the bottom, perfect for a swim! Unfortunately, the water here was quite chilly, so no swimming was going to take place! 

 Dad admiring the falls. This gives you an idea of the sheer size. I couldn't even get the entire waterfall in the picture! 

 Mom taking pics! 

 My dad and I at the base. 

 Mom and I at the base. 

Twilight lovers? Look familiar? It isn't the same one, but it made me think of Edward's meadow. SO pretty! 

My parents helped me have the full experience of being home while I was there. We partook in many activities that reminded me of my childhood and brought comforts only home could offer. Even some of the chores I used to do as a kid, but with cooler toys that made it way easier to get the job done. 

 Homemade strawberry rhubarb jam at 10:30 at night! Yum! 

 Moving bark, but this time using the tractor and not a shovel and wheelbarrow. Man, I wish we had one of these when I was a kid! 

Genesis Juice.... Life can't get any sweeter (or actually kinda mouth-puckering) than this! I remember when these came in glass bottles and had to be consumed within five days of arrival due to the fact that there are no preservatives in it whatsoever. Now they package them with airtight seals, so they last longer unless you open them. They are so incredibly yummy! 

The night before we left for Tahoe my parents treated me to an amazing dinner at my favorite winery: King Estates in little ol' Lorane, Oregon. Technically it is in Eugene, but it is only about two or three miles outside Lorane's 'downtown' area. We sat on the patio with a gorgeous view and enjoyed a nice glass of wine and a succulent dinner. I felt pretty spoiled. 

When we got to Tahoe (I have better pics that I will post another time, but for now the sweets will have to do!) my cousin who is a stellar camp cook, made a strawberry 'dump' cake. It sounds pretty weird, but oh boy was it amazing! All it was was strawberries, peaches, butter and white cake mix. He put it in the dutch oven and it turned out beautifully! (With all the sweets I ate on vacation, can you see why I am now cutting out sugar from my diet?)

When I got back to Oregon with Matt, we visited REI and I picked up a pair of Vibram Five Fingers. They are incredibly comfy, but I don't think they are going to be my running shoes any time soon. They gave me huge blisters! I do, however, love to wear them for everyday use. They are definitely like wearing a glove on your feet and I can't get enough of them! I wish they matched every outfit!

I have more pictures from my trip to Oregon with Matt that I will also post later, but they are currently still on my camera, waiting to be put on my computer. I am a little slow in that department!

When we left Oregon, we visited my aunt in San Francisco and took a day to wander the waterfront. I insisted on stopping by Ghirradelli Square and getting some ice cream. This sundae was so huge I couldn't even come close to finishing it, but boy was it delish!

 I was in a sugar coma for a while! 

The previous sundae, however, does not even come close to holding a candle to my true favorite ice cream. This ice cream is to DIE for. It is something that my family holds near and dear to our hearts and will travel out of our ways to make sure we get it! (If I were driving by this parlor, I would say 'to heck with my sugar free lifestyle! Give me some of this!') Hanford, CA's very own Superior Dairy. Heaven in a bowl... sugar coma bliss, chocolate chip divinity, death to any diet. It is so delicious the Matt and I have even made a point to pack some in dry ice and deliver it to my parents for Christmas and then this past trip take home six half-gallons in an ice chest to savor for months to come. (I am counting down the days until I can allow myself a little taste!) ONE scoop at this place is like a four or five scoop sundae at a normal ice cream parlor. It is colossal! 

 Yes, this is one scoop. One scoop with marshmallow cream. Nothing beats this delectable morsel of divine death by ice cream. If I could eat it every day with the promise I would never gain a pound... I would! If you are ever even close to the area (close being 100 miles) GO there! Seriously. 

One of the big kickers for me this summer was the expected surprise I received in the mail a few days after we returned. I went from not being able to run down the block to running two half marathons in one year. Both marathons were Rock 'n' Roll marathons and they have this wonderful little thing called the "Heavy Medal Series" where if you run two or more marathons in one year they send you medals to commemorate each step. I ran both eh Phoenix 1/2 and the San Diego 1/2 and the medal pictured below graced my mailbox. I have it hung with pride on the wall in my room. 

I am now looking forward to running the Las Vegas 1/2 marathon in December and will receive the "Triple Crown" medal. By December 2012, I hope to run my first FULL marathon. 26.2 miles! For now, however... I plan to stick to my 1/2's and just enjoy the ride. 

The summer has ended and the school year has begun. We are now into week five and I am loving every minute. Next summer is going to be even better than this one. How? I am not sure since this past summer will be VERY hard to beat, but it will! 

Breakthrough!

Today was monumental in my book writing world. By monumental I mean that I got past a point in my story that I have been struggling with for a year. Yes, you read that correctly, a YEAR.

My amazing husband is studying to become a principal and took me and my computer along with him to his favorite study spot at Paradise Bakery and Cafe so he could write one of his papers and we could have lunch together. I decided to use this time to focus on getting over my tough writing block. There is one scene in my book that is necessary for relationship development and has had me frustrated the entire time. I would look at it and think to myself, is this ever going to get easier? I can't tell you how many times I wrote and rewrote the same paragraph, trying to get it to move forward. I think I needed a new location and some focus to make it happen.

We have spent the past four hours sitting at a corner booth while he writes away on his paper and I type away on my story. I have finished a record page in the past four hours, when the previous record over the past five or so years, since day one of the current version of my story, has been a paragraph or two. What was it? The environment? The company? Both? Something else? I think it is a combination of a lot of things, and whatever they are, I am thankful! Now I can move on and get to the true drama of my story. I even think I am coming up with ideas for a title! No title, however, will be decided upon until the completion of my book, because I like to find titles out of the small, random areas.

Some of you may have picked out of that last paragraph one thing: One page. One page? That isn't much! She should have gotten at least five or six pages in over the four hours she has been there! Oh, no, my dear friends! Remember, it has taken me a YEAR to get past one paragraph, so one page is HUGE! Some authors will spend an entire day and only get in one sentence. It is what it is, and the characters have a mind of their own. One that tells you what to write and when. I guess my characters were as stuck as I was, that is, until today.

With this one page comes a lot of pride and also a trace of fear. My fear, you ask? I am afraid that once I find someone interested enough in my book to pick it up for publishing, they may cut out the whole scene! Who knows what my readers will like and what they say will attract a person to my book? I know that this baby of mine will be different when it (hopefully) hits the shelves. I need to brace myself and celebrate the milestones of the minute. One day, you will be seeing my name as you walk in to a Barnes & Noble or log onto Amazon for your Kindle. One day.

Reluctant Writer

Have you ever had to write something that you are truly passionate about, but didn't know where to go when you hit a certain point? Well... That is where I am at at this very moment. I have been wanting to write a book for almost seven years now, but have gotten to about page 90 and have frozen. 

I know how the book starts. I know how the book ends. So, why can't I finish it? It is all the middle. I have hit one scene that I don't' want to write and it has caused a complete halt in production... For about a year or maybe even two. Talk about severe writer's block! I am almost thinking about skipping this book and writing the sequel because I feel that one would be easier to write! 

How do you write a scene that isn't as interesting as it could be and make it reach its potential? I am having a rough time at this particular task. I am excited with the story wrapping around this scene, but completely bored with the scene itself. It is an essential scene, but a dull one to write. Those who like mushy, sweet stuff may love it, but I am frustrated. GAH! I need to find a writing coach, or someone who can just nudge me past this point. I am dying to finish this book. 

My ultimate goal was to write the book and have it in the hands of a publisher by this Christmas, but I am no closer to achieving this goal than I was when I made it. I will have to say that I want it in the hands of a publisher by next Christmas. 2012, the year that will make things happen! I want to publish a book, I want to finish THIS book. I am so passionate about making it happen I even tried to teach myself how to draw so that I could illustrate the cover and the chapter title pages. The writing is going much better than the drawing, however. Hahaha! 

I am a good writer. My story is worth telling. The book is worth reading. I now just need to get up, brush off the cobwebs and make it happen! I need to get the show on the road and complete the one project I have ever started that is nearer and dearer to me than any other. I can do it! Rough patches happen. I need to get through this one and glide on the smooth waters again. 

Spring 2013: A published book by me will (hopefully) grace the shelves of your local bookstore. 

Waiting

I have found it extremely interesting what I find out there when I am waiting for a good book to come out. Books are my biggest addiction in life. If I am not reading I feel lost.

My normal genre of books is young adult books that reach out to all age levels. Particular favorites?

The Mortal Instruments Series: Cassandra Clare
The Hunger Games Series: Suzanne Collins
Matched Series: Ally Condie

I am currently waiting for Cassandra Clare to come out with her next book as well as Ally Condie. The waiting is torturous. I hate "book lulls" as I call them. Forced to scrounge for random choices makes life a little more interesting, I must admit, but I miss "MY" books. The books that make me excited, frustrated, happy, sad, comfortable. The books I am familiar with. If I truly like a book, I will read it two to ten times, depending on how much I love it, or get out of each read.

Random discoveries:
Clockwork Three: Matthew J. Kirby
Any book by Emily Giffin
Hourglass: Myra McEntire
The Cardturner: Louis Sachar
Evermore Series: Alyson Noel
The Grace Series: L.L. Naeole
13 Little Blue Envelopes: Maureen Johnson
The Maze Runner Series: James Dashner
The Apothecary's Daughter: Julie Klassen

I know there are more. Lots, lots more. I have read more books in the past year than I have in a very long time. I tear through them. I will read pretty much anything you put in front of me. Even if it is crummy. The free limited edition free books on Kindle are where I find a lot of random things. Not all gems. Some pretty horrid, actually. Others VERY good and totally unexpected. A lot of these gems that can be found in there are promotional items because the author is coming out with a new book. If you decide to venture into the world of free Kindle books, be prepared to wade through a lot of garbage before you find the gem. But isn't that the way it is for everything? You have to look hard to find what you love? 13 Little Blue Envelopes was a find in that section and I loved it. Same with The Apothecary's Daughter.You never know.

So, in the meantime, I am going to struggle through some interesting finds until it is FINALLY:

October 4: Silence by Becca Fitzpatrick
October 18: Beautiful Chaos by Kami Garcia
November 1: Crossed by Ally Condie
DECEMBER 6: Clockwork Prince by Cassandra Clare (THIS one I am antsy for! More than you know!)

This is my upcoming excitement. I live for this like a preteen girl lives for Twilight or Justin Bieber. It is my addiction, my obsession. October can't come fast enough, but November and December are creeping along. The last time I was this obsessed was when Harry Potter and the Deathly Hallows book came out. I locked myself away and was not seen for a full 36 hours except to use the restroom and eat. Yes, I was that obsessed.

Some are into crafts, some into sports, others into cooking. I am into reading. Do I love crafts, sports and cooking, yes? But if I had to choose? Reading. Without a doubt. I am like a kid at Christmas when a new book comes out that I am waiting for. Hopefully these Christmases will come quickly! There are only so many books I can read in the time between now and then and that is only to hold me over and are a poor substitute for the truly good ones.

This is a small window into my reading obsession. I have shelves and shelves of books, 160 or so on my Kindle and a HUGE wish list just waiting until I decide to pick one up and actually have the time to read. There is never enough time in the day to get it all in, but I enjoy a little each day and a lot when there is time.

A Year of Me

Okay, so, I guess it is going to be much, much more time between posts than I planned! Hopefully I can change that!

A few weeks ago I got home from vacation and braved the horrible task of stepping on the scale. Many of you know that about a year ago I lost 40 pounds and was extremely fit compared to what I was when I started the task of eating right and losing weight. I went on a three month hiatus from my normal routine and when I finally got up the guts to stand on that scale, I had gained 15 pounds back! I was in shock and couldn't believe it! I was literally one pound away from a point I said I would NEVER hit again. NEVER! I had to do something, and quick!

I went and talked to my trainer after a huge freakout at home about what I had seen. He suggested that I make it a point to exercise regularly and to think about cutting refined sugars out of my diet completely and not to have any carbohydrates after 3:00 PM. He has been telling me this for about a year now and I was finally ready to listen. And listen I did! (And still am!)

He told me to start out with just three days and see how it went. I had my final bowl of ice cream on Sunday, August 14th and Monday, August 15 I began my "lifestyle change" thinking it was going to be torture. Three days, I could do it, right? I went to the grocery store and loaded up on fruit, veggies, tofu and peanut butter. Lots and lots of peanut butter.

Monday was horrible. I have to admit. I was going crazy. I had no idea what to eat or what to do with myself. I thought I had planned well, but I hadn't. I ate probably around 350 calories by 4:00 that day. Not nearly enough to sustain me for any true length of time. By the time evening hit I was about to eat everything in sight and tear apart anyone who tried to cross me. Frustrated can't even come close to explaining how I felt. I had to go to my boot camp that night and work out, but I knew that I didn't have enough calories in me to be truly effective. I knew that I could drive by the Target nearest work on the way to the gym, so I stopped in to grab a snack.

What kind of TORTUROUS, EVIL, SICK person puts the nuts at the end of the CANDY aisle? I had to walk past the entire aisle of candy, past all the chocolate covered caramel and peanut M&M's to reach the almonds. It is one thing to walk to the almonds when you can have candy, but when I knew I couldn't it was horrid! I found some delicious Planter's almonds roasted in sea salt and a diet coke, which I took out to my car and, being a good girl, measured out a serving. I was in heaven. Total bliss! Once finished I felt a lot better and knew I could face the rest of the day.

The next two days were a lot easier. I figured out what I could eat and made sure I focused on good, quality meals and snacks. After three days I ordered a cute necklace from Etsy.

http://www.etsy.com/listing/80231508/bud-branch-and-little-bird-lariat?ref=ss_listing

The worst was over. Now it was on to maintaining the "lifestyle change." (I make sure to say lifestyle change because it is not a diet. It is what I will be doing forever.) A week went by and I had lost 7 pounds. 7!! A pound a day. I was hooked. This was what I wanted.

I am now on day 14. 14 days without sugar and no carbs after 3:00 PM. I am in love with blueberries, apples with peanut butter and artichokes. Not together, of course. That would be a weird meal. Ha! I have no cravings for sugars and the only time I wanted a carb was Friday when a pizza sounded really good. I have a huge bag of Tootsie Rolls in my classroom and kids bring in cupcakes or cookies for birthdays all the time. I don't even bat an eye. My students are awesome. They know not to offer me any sugar and they also know that I will "auction" off any sweets given to me by pulling a stick and giving it to one of them.

This is the right thing. The right thing, and the right time. A year ago I would never have been able to give up my sweets. Never. Now... I have the right motivation. I will NEVER go back to the way I was. I won't have it. I just won't. This is a year of me and I am going to celebrate in that fact. My goal: A new wardrobe for Christmas.

Typical weekly workout schedule:

Monday: 4:30 AM workout with Shawna and 6:00PM bootcamp at the gym.
Tuesday: 4:30AM run/cardio with Shawna
Wednesday: 6:00PM Bootcamp at the gym.
Thursday: 4:30 AM  run/cardio with Shawna and 6:00PM bootcamp at the gym
Friday: 4:30 AM workout with Shawna
Saturday: 8:00 AM personal training private appointment at the gym.

If I make it to all of my workouts I am active for 8 hours a week plus whatever else I get to do during the week. Is it hard? Yes. Am I sore all the time? Of course! But is it worth every moment of the struggle? ABSOLUTELY!

I am a new woman. I have a positive outlook on life and I have more energy than I have had in a very long time. Someday soon I will allow myself a sweet treat once a week, but for now, none is good. This is a year of me, and I am loving it.